Al Quaeda inducing MIC to suicide

We have just completed several months excavating Afganistan caves. We dug up secret Al Quaeda papers outlining their strategy to destroy the U.S. military-industrial complex (MIC). To our surprise, their evil plans are coming to pass. After thoroughly analyzing these documents, we also realize that Al Quaeda’s strategies could not be meeting these successes without some moles in the U.S. government who, not Al Quaeda agents directly, have been brainwashed into a death wish for MIC.

The documents we found reveal extensive discussions on how to use the meager Al Quaeda resources to destroy the world’s greatest military power. They despaired for years over the immensity of their goal. Finally they concluded their only chance was to maneuver the MIC giant into committing suicide.

So they began terrorist attacks all around the world. Bombing planes, embassies, U.S. Marine barracks. Irritating the MIC like a mosquito on a muggy summer morning. MIC barely blinked. So Al Quaeda came up with a big bumble bee sting on 9-11. They attacked MIC’s symbols of power, World Trade Center and the Pentagon. That worked. The MIC giant roared and thrashed about. Invaded Afganistan where the Al Quaeda was holed up in caves. This adventure cost billions of $$$ and thousands of lives and poisoned the landscape and untold number of people (including MIC soldiers) with depleted uranium from spent ammunition. AND put the government of the MIC in the deepest debt in its 250 year history. But did not eradicate Al Quaeda. In fact, Al Quaeda got more recruits. The MIC giant’s blind anger did not subside. It thrashed its troops into Iraq even though Iraq had no connections to 9-11. More $$$ spent. More thousands killed. More land and people poisoned. MIC’s debt skyrocketed so high it is cutting back on education, social programs and health care, all the programs which weave the essential fabric of a stable society.

It’s just what the Al Quaeda had ordered.

The U.S. MIC is committing suicide.

Return to Martian archive